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22 Strange, Funny Trail Signs

As a skilled adventurer, you know paying attention to trail signs is imperative. Without keeping a close watch, you might end up lost. Even worse, you could be totally unprepared for imminent danger.

Then there are signs that aren’t so helpful. You look at it. And you look at it again. Instead of finding deep meaning, the only thing you can bring yourself to do is shake your head.

Well, get ready to do that over and over again. These are those kinds of signs.

1. If you don’t fall into the pit, it will spray noxious gases in your face. A win-win? Perhaps.

More Warning Signs

2. Expensive and risky. Consider our interest piqued.

Signs Signs Signs 2

3. “Believe it or not, this was actually one of the more clear signs on the trails” reads this photo’s Flickr caption.

Sign

4. Take a look at the bottom sign. Say what?!

Hiking trail sign post

5. This trail is open to hiking, not bicycling and looking at signs. Sweet!

DSC_0217

6. Something this ironic has to be fake.

More Signs

7. Why not just say “When Nature Calls”?

8. Sure beats bears, right?

Travel Caution

9. Hope they didn’t steal that sign from a road.

Sign near Sec 4 mile 17_IMG_0553

10. What do you think this sign used to say?

Important Sign.. Please Read

11. Even the French Alps are not immune to strange hiking signs.

Hiking Sign

12. You may or may not encounter a giant ball of string on this hike. If you do, do NOT attempt to climb it, no matter how ridiculously fun it may appear.

I was about to, but then I saw this sign...

13. Clearly a highly sophisticated security system.

14. Aside from fish, we really love all wildlife.

engrish funny pants fish
15. There’s nothing like a good carcass-in-area alert.

carcass alert

16. Quite an intuitive sign.

Intuitive Sign!

17. Wouldn’t “Hike at your own risk” suffice?

Sketchy Ladder Liability Sign

18. The most detailed trailhead direction guide ever.

Possibly The Most Detailed Trailhead Direction Road Sign I Have Seen. Ever.

19. A totem pole of dangers… During this hike you might: Jump on a rectangular block, trip over some strings, hold up a fallen tree or ahhhh SNAKES!!

sign at hiking trail

20. Are you sure this “stinging” tree isn’t just filled with bees?

News you can use!

21. This trail sign is open for interpretation.

The Yellow Trail Sign

22. Never let a bear walk an unleashed dog and bird!

No untethered birds

(Images via dsphoto-, jonathanshaffer, why68, chuntr, ccontemplations, 2000miler, eoconn, nonfinis, mtnegan, ebaumsworld.com, FailBlog.org, kibethan, realaworldjeffhester, nglinli, outbj, ryates3, rahhali, hellcat, taz)

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How to Waterproof Boots

Water-resistant boots seeped into the scene during the 1960s. It wasn’t long before outdoor enthusiasts embraced the luxury of having dry feet in wet conditions.

And why shouldn’t they?

Soggy boots add weight to your feet. Not to mention, it’s an incredibly uncomfortable feeling. We’re willing to bet that squishy boots are one of the leading causes of “be-trail.” That’s when you turn around one-fourth of the way into a hike because of a silly reason. Like sopping-wet boots that can easily be waterproofed.

If you didn’t buy footgear with Gore-Tex or ion-mask, follow the steps below and check out the video by Nikwax on how to properly wave a wand and turn your boring old boots into H20-repellent warriors.

Clean your boots prior to waterproofing. Let’s hope you’ve at least done this once before. If you haven’t, follow these quick steps:

  • Remove shoe laces and inserts.
  • Brush away all loose dirt and grime. Be sure to get around the eyelets.
  • Wipe off the boots from top to bottom with a damp rag.
  • Nikwax offers a cleaning gel that helps remove stains and preps footwear for waterproofing.

While the boots are still wet, apply the waterproofing treatment that best suits your boot’s material. For example, you should treat a leather boot with formulas like BearGaurd or Nikwax Fabric & Leather Proof Spray. Waterproofing is always most effective immediately after cleaning. Pay special attention to stitching, seams and hardware.

Allow your shoes to dry at room temperature. Don’t apply artificial heat. As the Nikwax guy says: “Cooking is for food—not footwear!” And your feet should be feeling drier on the trail in no time.

(Image via Flickr)

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Coming Soon: Hi-Tec’s New Lightweight Shoe

Hi-Tec is teaching us to tread even more lightly with the the V-Lite Infinity HPi.

Launched at last month’s Outdoor Retailer Summer Market trade show, the new shoe is a happy marriage between two technologies—an innovative one-piece upper and a custom-designed midsole. The hiker, which will be available spring 2011, has a fun, hip look in bright colors that reminds us of something almost digital and very cutting edge.

The S.U.Z.E. (Seamless Upper Zone Engineering) upper design is a digitally woven single piece with seams at the toe and heel. The near seamless construction of the upper helps reduce hot spots and blisters yet still gives ample support.

The best part, though, is its light-as-a-feather feel. The men’s shoe weighs in at 10.6 ounces in sizes 7 to 13, and the women’s shoe is 9.6 ounces in sizes 5 to 11.

With a specifically designed midsole, the new Infinity technology is said to harness energy by maximizing the running gait as well as correcting overpronation. The shoe is also coated with ion-masking waterproof technology. We’ve been told that when a boot is treated with this technology, it’s baked so completely in every fiber, you literally would have to drill a hole in the boot to let water seep in.

That kind of technology will have you walking on water in no time! The video below is from a viral marketing campaign Hi-Tec launched to promote its hydrophobic line of shoes.

Sadly, liquid mountaineering isn’t a real sport. However, you’re more than welcome to test it out, and send us live footage.

Additional features on the V-Lite Infinity include a breathable synthetic upper, a molded toe cap, reflective safety details, micro-fiber collar lining and a duel-density Vibram outsole. The hikers will be $130 to $135 MSRP in dark grey/infinity green/silver, olive/taupe/sunflower and red/black/silver for men and black/aquamatic/squash and dark chocolate/gold/apricot for women. And they’ll definitely be on our spring wishlist.

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9 Surefire Ways to Annoy Other Hikers

The art of trail etiquette has been honed throughout the years. Dos and don’ts are even etched in signs along the way.

They chide each passerby not to litter, feed the bears or fall off cliffs. The nerve! We’ll do what we want, thank you very much. After all, we’re human. Curiosity and a blatant disregard for the environment and its inhabitants tend to get the best of us.

Because of this inherent trait, it’s simple to upset those sharing the great outdoors. If this is the least of your worries, don’t mind your manners by following these nine steps.

1. Space out. Give yourself plenty of space on the trail. You might need to even walk with both your arms out like an airplane to ensure that other hikers keep a good distance away. If you have a hiking partner to two, be sure to have them stand near your side to create a barricade for other folks to attempt to pass. They’ll enjoy the challenge, right?

Busy trail

2. Challenge yourself. Never yield to anyone, even if you’re on a bike or a horse. Or a horse bike. Actually, it’s best if you play a game of Chicken with oncoming traffic. It will definitely boost the excitement level and perhaps even draw a crowd.

South Boundary Trail

3. Give shout outs. When approaching and bypassing someone from behind, instead of politely yelling “on the left,” screech: “Get out of the way, jerk!” Bring a fog horn along for extra fun.

yell!

4. Be heard. Hike with a boom box on your shoulder, Fresh Prince style. Be as deafening as possible. And by this, we mean LOOOOOUUUDD. It’s only natural.

5. Bring your dogs. Prowl the forest with your trusty pack of unsightly hounds. Without leashes, the medium-sized beasts attack anything with two legs. Or four legs. And when they do the doo? Leave it all over the trail.

dogs on the trail

6. And the kids. Speaking of unleashed beasts, your wee ones can raise just as much hell outdoors. You’ll have hikers fleeing the trail in no time.

boys fall behind, they're busy with their snacks - _MG_9510

7. Get trashy. Sometimes nature can look too pristine—almost as if it’s calling you to mess stuff up. Sprinkle a little litter here and some more garbage there. Especially since there’s no trash cans. What are you supposed to do?! Let the other hikers clean it up.

Litter Lout

8. Be quiet. Don’t report any damage or vandalism to the park authorities. Witness a gigantic fallen tree block the entire path? Catch someone in the act of starting a forest fire? Just turn a blind eye, and continue your peaceful journey.

Wind Rock to Craig's Creek 2007 - Trashed Trail #2

9. Take risks. Get off the beaten path more often. Pay no attention to the natural habitat in which you are intruding. Stomp all over everything. Leave your mark.

Off the beaten path

Now if you want to play nice, and not annoy everyone in sight, understand the steps in the following video. Have more grievances with fellow hikers? Feel free to vent in the comments section.

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Shoe Repair with a Smile

You’ve probably heard plenty of boot-related puns—especially if you read this blog on a regular basis. But have you ever seen this many in one window advertisement?

As one of the top stories today on Reddit, the sign set off a debate as to whether the picture was new or something that is “older then [sic] the interwebs.” Have you seen it before? Would you check out this shop based on its pun-filled flyer?

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Pronation vs. Supination

Did you know between 60 to 80 percent of people suffer from overpronation?

And, no, that doesn’t mean being excessively excited about a country.

What is pronation?

The opposite of supination, pronation happens when the heel bone comes inward and the arch collapses. It almost creates an inward roll of the foot. Over time, those who overpronate will wear down boots and shoes quickly in the toe area. Even worse, it can cause some painful foot problems including knee issues, shin splints, Achilles tendinitis and plantar fasciitis among other things.

On the other hand, supination, or underpronation, occurs when weight is supported by the foot’s anterior. When someone suffers from supination, they might appear bow-legged. Both over and underpronators suffer from shock absorbing inefficiencies.

The solution? Stiff shoes or boots for overpronaters; flexible shoes or boots for underpronators. Now everybody is happy.

Discover how to test your foot type in the video below from Runner’s World.

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Q&A with Custom Hiking Bootmaker

Charlie Van Gorkom custom bootmaker After reading Leo Tolstoy’s Where Love Is, God Is, Charles Van Gorkom knew his destiny: shoemaking.

He describes the short story as a little shoemaker in Moscow who blesses the lives around him with his simple craft and sincere heart.

“I was hooked,” he recalls.

Nearly four decades later Van Gorkom is doing exactly that. He owns and operates Van Gorkom Custom Boots, a business that has been featured in Men’s Vogue, The National Post and Best Life.

Those who seek his hiking boots, which retail at around $1,600 a pair, can expect to wait between 7 to 11 months.

How did you get your start?

To get my foot in the door, I bought a shoe repair that was for sale. This all happened in northern British Columbia, Canada, 750 miles north of the U.S. border where I still live today.

Soon my shop drew first generation immigrants from Finland, Norway and Switzerland, among others, and some retired shoemakers. I learned all I could from them. During this time whenever I heard of a shoemaker, even more than 1,000 miles away, I would go and meet him and learn all I could.

During this time, I worked on an amazing pair of boots handmade in Finland more than 100 years previously. The boots were worn almost continuously since by three generations passing father to son. I resoled them and noted their construction and determined that this is how my boots would be made.

Your learned hiking boot making from Randy Merrell—can you tell us more about this?

Around that same time, I began to correspond with Randy Merrell, who was beginning to teach bootmaking at his shop in Vernal, Utah. I was making boots and shoes daily by this time and doing orthopedic work for Worker’s Compensation Insurance. I was learning everything I would need to know about feet, their problems and needs.

After about five years of saving my pennies, I went to Vernal, Utah, and took the bootmaking course by Mr. Merrell. What I learned there? Everything I hadn’t learned anywhere else. The most valuable to me was pattern making. After taking his course, any shoe or boot I can picture in my mind is mine to make. Show me a picture, I can do it; describe it or make a sketch, I can make it.

Another great thing I took away from Randy’s course was vision. I could see how a living could be made just like the little shoemaker in Moscow by working in a small shop with your hands. This is what I do today.
custom made boots

What did you learn during your training?

I discovered that among the population of the world, more than 15 percent cannot comfortably fit standard off-the-shelf shoes and boots. This left a huge market for me, as I saw it. I think the percentage is much larger today.

I developed my own unique methods and techniques, materials and designs that would allow me to guarantee comfort and a good fit and durability that could potentially span the generations. Some of the boots I made 38 years ago are still in use today and nowhere near the finished line. I don’t make guarantees about the longevity, but my goal is to make the best that money can buy.

Did you hike before beginning your bootmaking career?

I have always been a hiker and walker. I walk every day; I hike as often as I can. I live in rugged hiking country where people come for the outdoors from all over the world. I know them personally and understand their needs.

I am accountable to my clients for every boot I make. I personally test every new boot design or refinement on myself and my friends rigorously.

What did you do before you realized your dream?

From 1969 to 1976, I taught elementary and high school English, art and music, wrote commercials for radio and TV, co-produced, wrote and performed a kid’s live daily TV show, worked in a sawmill, drew portraits from photos, taught and performed classical guitar.

I was an artist and poet looking for a niche, a way to make a living for my new family.
Charlie the Bootmaker

[Read the rest of this entry...]

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Eliminate Hiking Boot Odor

Nothing stinks quite like boots with an offending odor. And if you’re using hiking boots for actual hiking, that odor should appear sooner rather than later.

Once that nose-pinching stench arises, do you just toss those boots in the nearest Dumpster?

Not a chance.

The first step on the road back to beautiful-smelling boots is experimenting with the insoles. Typically hiking boots contain a removable insole. That’s what you can throw out. Replacement insoles can be found at any shoe store or repair shop from $5 to $50. If you’re looking to save some cash, try washing the insoles first. Let them bake in the sunlight to dry completely.

And if you wash ‘em, replace ‘em and that foul aroma is still permeating about like steaming garbage, then turn to Febreze or other odor cover-ups. Keep in mind that perfume and sprays don’t “eliminate” odor. Actually, if the smell is so disgusting, the smell-good sprays might skyrocket the odor into migraine-inducing territory.

Looking for other options? When it comes to stinky shoes, there are plenty of solutions.

Some suggest lightly dampening a paper towel with a water/baking soda/lime concoction and leaving the towel in the shoe over night. You can also try the same thing with coffee beans.

We recently tried just sprinkling baking soda on a pair and letting it set over night. The next day? Still stinky.

Did we forget more tips or tricks? Let us know how you keep your boots smelling brilliant.

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Top 10 Hiking Cakes

At HikingBoots.com headquarters this week, we served up a birthday dirt cake for one happy programmer. He requested such a cake for his 34th birthday, which is pretty awesome. While inhaling the chocolate “dirt,” another coworker commented: “This is a perfect hiking cake.”

In a forehead-smacking moment, we snapped a picture of the delicious masterpiece *after* it was almost devoured. We decided to investigate what other Mother Earth-inspired cakes were floating around the interwebs.

1. Dirt Cake – Made with egg whites and applesauce (instead of oil) to cut out some fat, the healthy version of the classic “dirt” cake uses low-fat chocolate wafers to get that earthy look. Most of the cake is missing due to lack of foresight and an uncontrollable appetite.

2. Hiking Boot Cake – Created from sponge cake, this chocolate-brown boot definitely has a kick to it. Wonder if those laces would be difficult to digest?

hiking boot cake

3. Wedding Cake – Ah, love takes us to such great heights. Are those husband-and-wife figurines edible or what?

Hiking Cake

4. Cartographer’s Cake – This mountainous invention came from a love of map making and hiking. According to its Flickr page, the red lines are real trails in the area that all to scale. Talk about attention to detail!

The Presidential Range

5. The Drive-by – This looks like a hiking cake for the lazy. Not that it isn’t elaborate, because it really, really is. However, we imagine that person in the cherry-red car isn’t getting much of a workout.

6. Tramping Cake – What is tramping, you ask? Well, it’s New Zealand’s term for hiking. They call a hiker a tramper. Expedition groups are called tramping clubs. And since this cake was made by a New Zealander, it’s a tramping cake. Yum.

Tramping/Hiking Cake

7. Hiking Partners – Just looking at this thing has our mouth watering—layers of chocolate and vanilla cake teeming with chocolate buttercream and marshmallow fondant. Oh la la.

hiking cake

8. Rock Climbing with Fairies – Spotting fairies on a hike is a rarity at best. Discovering a cake with such attributes, not so much.

Rock Climbing (with Fairies)

9. 40th Birthday – Can you tell that the mounds of darker chocolate say “40″? It took us a minute, too.

10. Woodland Chocolate Cake – Chocolate fudge, whipped bittersweet ganache, chocolate meringue buttercream, handmade cocoa-dusted meringue mushrooms. Mmmm. All for a couple training for an Appalachian Trail hike. What a peculiar yet fabulous way to prep!

Woodland Chocolate Cake

(Images via cakecorner, laurenfriendman, WhatsCakin.com, Reesed.com, 4GoodnessCake!, tesorocookies, jgosche, benkimball1, sweetsbyzoe)

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Q&A: The Barefoot Hiker

Lorenz Kerscher in the Bavarian Alps

There’s nothing that can come between some people and nature. Not even shoes.

Part of the minimalist footwear movement, barefoot hikers trade Gore-Tex and Vibram to feel their uncovered feet on the earth—whether it be wet, dry, rocky, sandy, squishy, cold or hot.

Why does the Hiking Boots Blog investigate these shoeless trekkers? Because many do carry hiking boots in a backpack for when the terrain becomes a little too intense.

Barefooter Lorenz Kerscher gave us some insight into this oft-overlooked world. Kerscher runs a German- and English-language website about barefoot parks in Europe.

So, what are barefoot parks or foot sensory paths exactly? Kerscher talks about these parks and more.

Hiking without boots seems dangerous to most people. Is “shoes optional” hiking risky? Why do you do it?

I really love going barefoot and do it as often as possible. It is gorgeous to feel surfaces like mossy forest soil, moist earth along the fields, flat stones or dewy grass.

Many trails have such sections where going barefoot is not dangerous. Passages of uneven ground like rounded stones or roots may be an interesting challenge for the muscles of the feet. I found out that this training improves the statics of the body and thus helps me get rid of dorsal pain. This is in my opinion a major benefit of barefoot hiking.

What made you decide to start going barefoot?

I was born like that and loved it from childhood. During my life I found more and more occasions to do it. And I found more and more people who share this passion.

You hike with boots in your backpack. When do you use them?

I go barefoot for fun and not for shortening my lifetime. As soon as the trail becomes too exposed or consists of loose or sharp-edged gravel or even boulders, I put on shoes.

When I get tired, I also put on shoes. I do this because weariness enhances the risk to bump my toes and lose balance. Furthermore going downhill on bare feet is much tougher than stepping up, so I wear shoes for most downhill sections.

When you do wear hiking boots, what’s your favorite brand and why?

Before setting out on a hike, it is important to find out if the trail has sections that I regard as too dangerous for barefoot hiking. For definitely easy trails, I leave the shoes at home. Otherwise I have to decide if trekking sandals are sufficient or if hiking boots are required.

Only a few brands are suited for my broad feet. I have Teva trekking sandals, which are quite durable, and boots from the German manufacturer Meinl, because they fitted best during try-on.

You’ve mentioned “foot sensory paths.” How do they differ from regular paths?

Foot sensory paths, barefoot trails and barefoot parks have become very common in Germany and other European countries during the last decade.

They vary in length from some dozen yards to a few miles and are equipped with a variety of soil materials that are all suited for going barefoot. They may include adventure stations like wading through a stream, balancing and easy climbing. Meanwhile, millions of people per year are seizing this chance of a short, safe but exciting barefoot hike.

What’s the most important thing to remember on a hike?

Beware of insane ambition!

(Images via Lorenz Kerscher)

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